Friday, March 27, 2009

Its been long OVER DUE

Wow I am not even sure where to begin... Its been over a year since I last posted a blog and let me tell you I HAVE MISSED IT!!!! I haven’t even looked at my blog. I feel really disappointed in myself for not writing because it used to bring me such joy. Especially if I was having a bad day I would just sit down look back and it would bring me back to a time where I was super happy and it would bring a smile to my face. Like I said once before this blog to me is like a journal of my life and I happen to share with the rest of the world. My writing isn’t the best and most creative…. My grammar and spelling sucks…and I don’t get super deep in my writing. Its usually just nonsense and crap, but its my crap and crap that I love. I speak about my nights out with friends at either a dinner or a party, or about my travel experience, and maybe about some movies I have seen. All these little stories give me something. Its gives me joy and laughter. It’s made me aware on how I have changed. I have changed a lot over the course of a year. I have met some amazing people. I have moved from New York City over to Sydney Australia. I work a full time job. I learned how to cook amazing meals. I fell in LOVE (Hench the move to Australia) .

It really is amazing what can happen in life. Never in my life did I ever imagine that I would leave New York. There is so much I want to talk about, but I have no idea where to begin. What I am thinking of doing is to start from the beginning. Start from right before I left New York and decided to leave to Sydney. I know that I am going to be missing a lot of details and I won’t possibly be able to capture the moment but I am going to try my best. My best guides to these moments are going to be the pictures that I have taken over the course of the year.

Attention readers…… A lot of this might not make sense and I might jump from one thing to the next but it all makes sense in my crazy head. I want to be as open and honest as possible but again there are something that I like to keep to myself and private. I wont be covering everything either. I think the purpose of all this is so that I can get back to my normal head space. To get back into a routine of what I used to do. More importantly I think it will help in the healing process. I am sure I am going to shed a lot of tears while writing this but I know that in 2 or 3 years I will look back and I will smile. (My eyes are watery now). Smile like I always have. I want to also thank all my friends for the support and love. You guys are truly amazing. Even from half across the world you guys still manage to put a smile on my face. I also want to thank all the wonderful people I have met here in Sydney. You guys rock!!!! I want to thank my mom for always sending me kisses via text message. (she doesn’t know I have a blog but I can still thank her). Even thou I am feeling tons of pain and I want to strangle him I want to Thank CT because without him I wouldn’t have known what it is to give up everything, become vulnerable and to love like I have never loved before. The feeling was amazing and still is to a degree. I haven’t forgiven CT yet and it can be a while before I do. HELL …. I haven’t forgiven myself yet!! But I want too and I know that overtime I will forgive both him and myself.

……Get readyzzz people Jonathan Vargas is back!!!!!! Well kinda … hehe

Hope all is well


Queer Me Now said...


Cornell said...

girlllll you cray cray.

but I love this post.

its so thought-out. the writing is perfect. clear and concise and to the point. i can't wait to read more.

-Cornell Madonna Lemons Higgins hehehehehe

ok i betta stop

p r i o r O R A N G E said...

you've been missed

Marco Channing said...

Oh my fucking god! I have not removed you from my RSS reader in hopes that one day you'll blog again. Welcome back and I can't wait to read and see the pictures of your adventures.

Marco Channing said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
np0804 said...

It is good to know you are well. Your fans were getting worried about your long absence.

Jason Ridge said...

You better start talking..... duh.. I already know... but I have missed you so much and yes I'm still posting nude pics of me ..It's a given


VividAdultStar said...

i'm glad ur back. i miss reading your blog :)

ricci said...

At last!
While i don't understand everything (do i have to?) welcome back for a reality check, u can find love in NYC as well dear and the 2nd best place is of course europe for good old fashioned romance....Keep up posting

VTLO said...

"without him I wouldn’t have known what it is to give up everything, become vulnerable and to love like I have never loved before" sounds pretty deep to me babe.. Can't wait to read & see more & SEE YOU!!! missed u so much!